On a recent episode of the Ordinary People, Ordinary Things podcast, Melissa Radke said, “That has honestly been kind of a prayer of mine. ‘Please don’t let this have been for nothing. God, change me. Teach me. Show me. Interrupt me.’”
What is the “this” she is talking about: The coronavirus and everything that word means right now.
Self-quarantining.
Social distancing.
Businesses closing.
Markets crashing.
Job losing.
This is something unlike any we have ever experienced before. But I am a big believer that everything happens for a reason, that God is using this for his purposes.
And just like Melissa, I want this time to mean something. I don’t want to come out of this quarantine more fearful. I want to come out better.
So I’m asking myself a series of questions. Not questions like, “Do I have enough toilet paper,” but questions that make me dig deep into my heart. Questions that reveal who I am and who I want to be.
Today I’m sharing those questions with you.
10 Questions to Become a Better Person During the Coronavirus Quarantine
1. What pace of life do I want?
Life is much slower with no events to go to, no shopping to do, and no places to go. It’s an extreme difference from our usual go-go-go.
There are great things about having a full schedule and there are great things about slowing down. And you get to choose where you land on that spectrum.
What pace of life do you want for you and your family? And, do you need to make any changes based on that decision?
2. Is my life going in the direction I want?
Crises like this make us feel less certain about our futures and more introspective. Our priorities and values are pushed to the forefront, and it is the best time to evaluate if your life is going in the direction you want it to.
What are the things that are the most important to you? Are you living in such a way that those priorities get your best? Your best time? Your best attention?
My answer: not always.
And I think that’s what most of us would say. So what changes do we need to make?
3. What impact has social distancing had on you?
Have you been dramatically impacted by social distancing? Are there people’s necks you have missed hugging? Are there people in your life who are missing you right now? People who feel a void because they haven’t been able to see you?
It is easy to let social media connection and text messaging fool us into thinking we have good relationships.
Has your life been different without face-to-face relationships? Do you feel a loss?
If not, you may be missing real community. And when this is all over, perhaps you should go out of your way to build deeper friendships.
4. Is your deepest nature selfish or generous?
The coronavirus has proved that crises bring out some people’s best side and some people’s worst side.
Bare grocery shelves and a shortage of items despite any mandatory lockdowns show that, when push comes to shove, some of us become selfish and some of us become generous in a crisis.
I think the real question is who do you want to be?
Do you want to be the person who darts around others to get 3 packages of toilet paper, or do you want to be the person who grabs an extra bag of flour for the elderly couple waiting in the back?
Was your first instinct to get enough for yourself or to leave enough for everyone to share?
5. How will you use this extra time?
What do you want to accomplish with this extra time, because it may never come around again in your lifetime.
Do you want an organized closet? Do you want to re-watch all 10 seasons of Friends?
Do you want to play games with your kids? Or learn something new? Or have meaningful conversations with your spouse?
Maybe a little bit of everything.
You get to choose how to spend this time. But make a choice instead of letting the time pass without thought.
6. How do I view others?
People seem to be reacting to this virus in one of two ways:
1) They are afraid and panic. or
2) They dismiss the virus and ignore precautions entirely.
And maybe most of us go back and forth between these.
But my question isn’t about which camp you are in. It’s about how you view and treat people on the other side.
I quickly found myself judging people who think differently than I do until I saw this quote from Brene Brown that stopped me in my tracks: “All I know is that my life is better when I assume that people are doing their best. It keeps me out of judgment and lets me focus on what is, and not what should or could be.”
7. How do I handle uncertainty?
There’s no doubt that this virus caught us all by surprise. No one has experienced this before, and the future is unknown to all of us.
These circumstances are revealing to each of us how we deal with uncertainty. How well we live with not knowing what tomorrow will bring.
Is it hard for you not to be consumed with fear, panic, or worst-case scenario thinking?
If that’s the case, in the short-term, be very careful about your input—what you are allowing in your mind—by limiting your consumption of news and social media.
In the long-term, you can work on strengthening your hope and trust muscles. Read books on these subjects, take courses, and consider working through your fears in therapy. (No judgment here; I have done all three of those things.)
8. Will you do anything differently in the future to be more prepared for unforeseen circumstances?
I typically do not stockpile any items. And I made the mistake of thinking everyone would behave normally when news of the virus broke.
So, I found myself searching high and low for items like toilet paper, baby wipes, and headache medicine, because panic shoppers had already bought them out.
Lesson learned: always keep more than one pack of baby wipes on hand so I won’t be up a crap creek without a paddle (or wipe). 😜
But seriously, whether it’s specific to a virus, or more general like a natural disaster or a power outage, are there things you need to buy or assemble so you will be more prepared?
Ready.gov suggests every family create a basic supplies kit to be used in an emergency.
9. Are there any financial changes you should make to prepare for unforeseen circumstances?
This is just as much of an economic crisis as it is a health one, and many families are being hit hard by the business closures, job losses, and less consumer buying.
My husband and I are big Dave Ramsey fans and live by his rule to have an emergency fund of 3 to 6 months of expenses. That emergency fund has given us security when my husband has been laid off in the past.
Beefing up your savings may be an important goal for your family.
Having multiple sources of income may be another.
Business expert Chalene Johnson said that this crisis has proven that whether you are a blue-collar worker, white-collar worker, business owner, or retiree, only having one source of income is risky. Every household needs two, if not more, healthy streams of income.
10. If you were to die, would you be ready?
It would be irresponsible of me to talk about a health crisis like this without mentioning that people are dying from this disease. And if not from this disease, than from car accidents, cancer, heart disease, and a million other things.
This virus is teaching us all that we cannot put off the most important things in life.
- Make sure you have a real, one-on-one relationship with Jesus
- Make sure your loved ones know that you love them
- Make sure you have a will in place
Join me over on Facebook or Instagram to chat about this post and much more. I’d love to hear your thoughts on what you are learning from this crisis.
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